There will be no need for one of them to try to rescue the other when a man and a woman are together and they are both in touch with their power. Both of them will have boundaries and will not carry too much baggage.
Rather of seeing each other as rivals, therefore, they will be able to really be there for each other and give their help when necessary. This will allow them to grow and develop.
Because of this, being together will have a positive impact on their lives. Now, this doesn’t mean that when their injuries are activated, there won’t be moments; what it means is that they can move through them.
It will limit the amount of tension they will experience by holding space for each other to do this. This is likely to show that they realize that a relationship should not be full of pleasure; that there will be times when there will be pain.
They’re not going to have their heads in the clouds, they said another way, which will make it easier for them to manage the ups and downs. There is a strong likelihood that both of them will have done a fair amount of work on themselves to have such a relationship.
Both will have the ability to discuss and work on their own problems, and no interest whatsoever in blaming their spouse for what comes up for them. Besides the influence that this relationship will have on their own life, the impact that will have on the world around them will also be present.
A Bigger Impact
We will have more power to give to the world by being together and loving each other. The positivity and love between them will eventually spread far and wide.
Unless, on the other hand, one of them wanted to save the other, it would stop them from having any impact on the world. One of them is not going to be in a good way and the other is going to spend most of their time and effort trying to change the other life.
A Common Occurrence
So while being in a relationship where they don’t need to save their partner will be far more satisfying for someone, this isn’t something that often takes place. This then leads to a situation in which a man tries to save a woman or a woman tries to save a man-and this, of course, can also happen between two men and two women.
When this happens, one person will behave more like the parent of the other people than their partner. That may even be what’s normal for them, and they won’t be able to see how unhealthy it is.
A Way of Life
A man may then be in a relationship with a woman whose life doesn’t go anywhere, and she may have mental and emotional challenges in addition to that. It will take a lot out of him to be with her, giving him very little in return.
It will then be as if he is stealing his life force from him, but that won’t be enough to push him away. And, whatever he does for her, there’s a chance she won’t really change her life.
One of Many
He could look back on his life and see that he wasn’t with a woman like this for the first time. Because of this, he may assume that all women are incapable of saving them, and that it is up to men.
What may also reinforce this theory is that he may have a number of male friends who are also with women who come across as if they were unable to do so. Nevertheless, if he ends up with a woman who doesn’t need to save, he may soon lose interest in her.
Trapped In a Role
There’s a chance the man has been playing the rescuer’s role for so long that he probably doesn’t know how to behave anymore. He is likely to believe that what he does for others defines his value.
Therefore, if you don’t need to rescue another person, it can be as if he has no purpose. He may also be afraid of his own needs; helping others can therefore be a way for him to fulfill his own needs indirectly.
Basically, it’s just going to be a mask he’s wearing to get approval; it’s going to have nothing to do with who he really is. His real needs and feelings are likely to be overshadowed, and the fear of being rejected and/or abandoned is likely to be what hides them from others.
What this can show is that at the beginning of his life he had to take care of his caregivers ‘ needs. The roles were reversed and he became the caregiver and became the child / children of his caregiver / s.
He would have thought his needs were wrong, and ignoring his needs would have been a matter of survival, which is why he had to disconnect from them and focus on the needs of his caregivers. This would be taken as a sign that he was inherently wrong, setting him up to believe he was worthless.
Then a false-self would have been created, a way for him to please his caregivers. He may have believed that other people were incapable and that it was his job to rescue them by being around people who couldn’t take care of their own needs.
So, even though he would have come to believe that his true self was wrong, he would have developed a false self that would have allowed him to feel empowered. Rescuing others can be what makes him feel strong and powerful; whereas he could hit rock bottom if he were to let go of this role.
If a man can relate to this and wants to change his life, it may be a good idea for him to seek external support. A psychologist or a healer can provide this.
Oliver JR Cooper, a teacher, prolific writer, author, and coach, is from England. His informative commentary and study covers all aspects of human development, including affection, friendship, self-love, and inner consciousness. Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice, with more than one thousand eight hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour.